Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Overcoming the fear (#235)
We must be available to talk to each other. How is it that when we most need someone to share with we find it within ourselves to shy away and let our fears control the situation? My greatest hurdle in life has been to recognize that fear was keeping me from experiencing life with myself as the arbiter of circumstance. I just could not see that I had the ability to shape outcomes with my behaviour and cognition. I have since learned that fear is the cage that would keep me inside never to allow me to feel worthy or appreciated. I know who I am today. Let me repeat that again. I know who I am today. I am not ashamed or afraid to tell anyone that I have principles and guidelines that define my essence. I find it ironic that the one thing my fear kept me from doing was the best thing I could have happen to me. Finding out who and what and how I am is not scary, it is rewarding. Simply because the depths I searched within myself to find me have been enlightening and true to my nature and spirit. I have always liked that I care about other people, I have always liked that existence is full of adventure and mystery. These things are who I am. They define me to the core of my life. How could I have ever found myself if I had continued to be afraid to honestly examine me. I was afraid that the ugliness that life at times shows us would be what I found. The best of who I am was greater than the illusion of some worst human qualities that attempt to infiltrate the amazing reality of existence. I have conquered fear from ever having a say in who I am or how I will live my life. To have reached this point of enjoying life with a fullness, I had to first conquer the fear that would not let me examine who I am.