Monday, May 17, 2010
The art of listening (#472)
It is so difficult for me to listen to others when my mind is daydreaming or my voice is engaged. I seem to think that I have an opinion on everything and if not I am trying to formulate one out of thin air. These are the practices of an undisciplined mind. Partly learning from my previous behaviour is recognizing this and establishing within me the reason for it. If I am to change this behaviour I must know the root of it. It seems to me that two main elements of psychology are at play, within me, as behind everything I wish to change from a bad habit into a good one. They being, low self-esteem and selfishness. I can only assume from knowing me that I have an impulse to be accepted by whoever I am conversing with and I have an impulse to want to feel intellectual and wise. There is nothing wrong with wanting to be accepted and recognized as wise unless I do these things at the expense of others. I have come to know that appearing to know a lot of things is false and that we all are insecure at times within relationships and that is okay. Having now understood my actions and motives it is easier for me to accept whatever reality there is in front of me and quietly listen to others. It is empowering to know that I have corralled my impulses and I am now available to help others by listening through to their concerns. I have found a way to ground myself in concentration focused on others instead of what I can get from others. It is quite refreshing and satisfying knowing that I am still growing in personal maturity.