Sunday, November 18, 2012

My own worst critic (#1388)

No one is more critical of me than I. I have scolded myself more times than I will ever remember. Which brings me to another subject, remembering. I haven't a clue where most of my memories have gone but I know this much, I cannot find them. It seems that my memory is on a timer and that timer has gone off more times than I can remember. lol. Circular logic here. Anyway, the criticism I heap upon myself has lessened with time because the mistakes I make now are not as obvious in the sense that they are super important. I make a lot of little mistakes because I don't give enough time to all things that I do. My foundation is good and right but the building blocks upon it are somewhat loose. Kind of like my humor. :) What has happened for me though is that by being my own worst critic, I have adapted very nicely to my conscious. I have a conscience and the emotions within it, have matured to verify that fact. None of us is without doubt about ourselves but it is in how we approach that doubt that we find real differences. Some of us have gotten it in our heads that we don't forget and what we think today is a comprehensive compilation of all we have learned or intuitively know. I can testify to the fact that we are not all comprehensive in what we remember and furthermore, we are not likely to remember most of what we have learned. Our memories are not perfect and can be a cause of consternation for those of us who place heavy reliance on them. I have admitted to being both critical, and forgetful, of myself into this post, well done me! I don't beat myself up for being imperfect, like I used to do when I was younger. Getting older is showing me that what has passed me in the past is likely to stay there and what I keep myself doing today is what is most critical, even when I screw it up. :)

No comments: