Thursday, January 30, 2014

The 5 year mark (#1826)

This post wraps up 5 years of posting mostly every day. I missed on 3 days during this stretch with the caveat that I made up for it the very next day as soon as I realized I forgot. The first missed day was in 2009, day 3, when the habit of it had not yet begun within me. Understandable on that one since I had no idea I would be posting every day. But what that first missed day made me realize is that I wanted to post every day and that is when I decided to make it so. So I wrote 2 posts the next day to at least show my intent. The next missed day posting was in 2010, day 622. I was very sick and didn't even realize at all that I had not posted that day. Again though I made up for it the very next morning by writing 2 posts. Finally, in 2011, day 1042, I again was very sick and totally forgot to write a post and as usual by now, I posted 2 posts the very next morning. Those 3 open days with not writing a post serve me well as the thorn in my side so to speak to remind me just how imperfect I am. I am no different than anyone else, I have an ego at times that tries to puff me up and unless I have my imperfections close at hand I can become gullible to the illusion that I am something better than I am. I have enjoyed this run of posting about something over these 5 years. It is not much different from keeping a consistent journal. Somehow this blog serves to soothe my need to be relevant although that is a longing with little hope for a solution. However, I am what I am and trying to be better at what I am is my goal. This blog helps me with that since I get to put my raw thoughts down and then leave them open for scrutiny. That's okay though since I know I come from an intent that has the best of what others and myself can be.

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