So whatever comes to us within our control is ours to be responsible for. The concept of "free will" is valid and we who choose to be the masters of our own fate have it all around us. I am not under any immediate restrictions except those which I choose to place on myself. I have not made choices that have restricted me by others outside my own self except to live in a society governed by laws and ordinances. Otherwise, how I think and act are my choice. Within that thinking and acting I get to change my mind and behavior based upon new revelations or new information. My choice again.
I know this, that when I have respect and civility toward others who do the same for me, there is little I can be in conflict with. It is those who do not return respect or civility to me that create the angst that so much of our society currently experiences. But that is their choice and my choice is to remove all of myself as best I am able from their presence. I have learned something very valuable in life. I don't have to be around anyone who cannot accept reality with a care and curiosity. Whether family or acquaintance it makes no difference, I will remove myself since it is the one thing I can control in a group setting, that being whether I am there or not. I value who I am and if it costs others my presence then they need to make better choices if they want me present. Choices, life is all about choices.