Tuesday, December 15, 2009

The circle of life (#319)

The purpose for the circle of life. I have considered why we have to endure the reality of life being cyclical. It has an effect on the development and maintenance of our emotions. Without pain, suffering, joy and happiness...etc., we would not have a perspective on the panorama effect each and every one of these emotions represent. This discussion is cold and insensitive, I know. I am only trying to understand the way life has been laid out for us in this existence. I have struggled mightily with existence over this dynamic. I am purely elated when the perfection of happiness envelopes me and I don't question it's beautiful right to exist. On the other hand, when the deepest of wrought despair overcomes me when part of my heart is crushed by death, I rage against all of existence to retract it's choice of punishing hurt. Living through these moments in my life stretch the gamut of my experiences. Is this what the cycle of life is for? For me to experience all the possibilities of sense perception. The smiles I have worn and the tears I have shed are evidence enough that the circle of life has a consequence. I still struggle with having to experience this circle of life paradigm from birth to death. I want to have my existence elevated beyond this known reality. Not some reality that happens after death but a new reality while I am still alive in existence. This inner struggle I have is continually present within me.

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