Thursday, December 2, 2010

The struggle to find my convictions (#671)

This post is about me. It is how I came to know what is important in life to me. I know we are all different and many reasons exist to describe who I am and how I live. I was taught by my parents, family members, friends and teachers. What I took in from all these lessons is what eventually defines me when I am out putting to action my convictions. It took time for my convictions to define themselves to me. I always knew what kind of human I wanted to be in theory but that is difficult to do when life in reality is so complex, or so I thought. Now that I am older and have perspective about mine and others' experiences, I see that there really is no reason to ever compromise my convictions. I know that now, to live in the ideal way I have always wanted to since I was a child, I must always let reality exist around the truth in my life. When I stand up for and with my principled convictions, the outcome will be whatever it ends up being. The outcome isn't up for me to decide. I don't deserve to be able to control what will be, no one does. I get to be a part of whatever it is, period. I am satisfied enough with that. I know that my life is what I do have some control over and reflecting back to everyone else who I am and what I stand for is my full time job. This may sound like I am not trying to do more about things I could effect in ways outside or greater than my own person, that would be wrong. I am trying with all my might to effect greater outcomes but I can only do that by being the best me I can be. Instead of trying to manipulate events or people I am only trying to be an example for others if they choose to turn there focus on me.

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