This is more about my personal balance of letting people into my life and not about anything else in particular. I have found that no one meets my high standards of great friendship. What is also true is that I cannot rise to the level of my own mind's demands, therefore no one else is to be expected to do what I cannot do. But neither should I dismiss my high level of what constitutes a great friend. What I need to do is find the will to trust folks where previously I have not. Life is too short to clump everyone into the same behaviors I have been exposed to in my past. This is a new day and new people are in it. I have to get out of my protective shell and allow new people and ideas to filter through my life. I have my same old rock solid principles to guide me but I need to allow for trust to have it's expression. Whether the trust is violated or upheld is what I need to find out and continuing on that path is right. I cannot withdraw into a shell and not allow for anything to happen out of some assumed preconceived notion. It is a struggle I deal with since most of my experiences have led to dismal results in interacting with my trust on the line. Practice makes perfect, or at least practice does sharpen one's abilities and my abilities in determining how I should live need sharpening. I don't want to miss out on life as it is happening around me because I am too shy or fearful of it's outcome. Life needs to be an adventure and wising up to that is a great accomplishment. Anyway, letting people into my life is necessary for me as well since living my life within the wonders of this existence is the most important thing I can do.
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