Since the beginning of me and all my remembering of me I have steadfastly had one question on my mind, why? Why this or that, why, why why. The one word in my vocabulary I could not do without. My nature is most evident when I am wondering something that I wish to know. The grit or determination I apply to each why in my life is attributable to the persistent importance of knowing the answer to the particular why at the time. Although the grit may vary from why to why, the sense within myself to know never varies in degree. I have an insatiable hunger, thirst, drive, what-have-you to be in harmony with the knowable and an uncomfortable angst to struggle with the unknowable. It is the unknowable that is the fleeting realization which I want to be a part of. I want more than what is discoverable I want the undecipherable as well. This may sound or appear confusing but I don't know how else to describe the feeling within me that draws me toward glimpses of what I don't know. I feel lucky to know that I can almost anticipate the edge of something I don't know yet be frustrated by my inability to use logic and common sense to get closer to what it is. My why world is always just on the verge of something, then it is gone. Such is my dilemma. I have reconciled this incompleteness of connectivity to my own imperfection of thought evaluation and implementation. But again I ask why. I love my life and the compassion and curiosity I hold as the two greatest strengths a human can live and exhibit. The fact that I am not the brainiac I wish I was is just less icing on my cake. lol.
1 comment:
Your Blog makes me smile today, You have always been that Why! why!Son, You started asking Why when you were old enought to talk and its good that your still asking why? Love You , Mom
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