It seems that most things in life involve compromise as a strategy. I agree with that because when we can all share in some way with each other there can be progress and bonding from it. In politics, belief systems, economics and other civilized paradigms, we can find ways that mutually benefit us to maintain respect, peace and harmony. There is one area in my life where I cannot compromise, and that is in the ideal of love. I am not speaking of love generally, but love between a woman and myself. I have never married but I have gotten real close two times and less close another time. However I managed to sabotage those relationships out of some deep doubt that I wasn't in love, but instead wanted a mate. It has occurred to me as I have gained better insight into myself that in the area of getting married to a woman requires of me to be truly in love with her. I know this about myself now and it explains a lot about my previous behavior. Why is being in love with the only one woman so important to me? I suppose it has something to do with my upbringing. Throughout my life I have seen many family members and close friends marry twice, thrice and more. However, even with that there is more here for me on this subject of love. I am a romanticist, a true love must reside within me that takes my breath away and causes me to act in such silly ways. I need that for me. I don't know and won't presume personally how others deal with this. But I have seen much evidence of some marrying for security, status and revenge. Yes even revenge, as a way to get back at someone who has hurt them. For me marrying for love will be my strategy and if I am unlucky and not able to find that love well then that will have to be fine enough. No one deserves anything and neither do I. I just hope that I haven't messed things up so badly in my life that a true love is too late for me.
1 comment:
it's never too late for love.
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