I know when i was young I was so angry that nothing that could be right about our world was actually right. Oh there were a few things that inspired like walking on the moon but for the most part I was mostly disappointed and given to becoming cynical about our future. I began a cycle in my life where my pleasures and desires were the only things that made my hierarchy of daily calculations. But not soon after I found that my own fulfillments were not a destination but less so, more like a temporary stopover. I began to realize that the world was not better like it should be because I wasn't involved in making it so. I expected others to carry my weight. So since my little self revelation I have been letting go of my wants and desires to a more basic needs only basis. In that way my time is valued over everything else. I don't give my time to things that are part of the problem or less than honorable in their nature. I can control who and where I spend my time. My time became my genesis for evaluating how to live my life. What do we do with our lives is a question we all will confront, hopefully in time to actually bring some good to fruition. Because if we get to the end of my life and have to face who I was and what I did I want there to be a smile on my face because although I didn't start out early in life helping to change reality for the better at least I finally did show up and carry my weight and maybe a little bit more. My time spent doing good is the value I had been looking for and because of that I know I have touched reality in a way that has caused reverberations to it. Isn't that what we all wanted to begin with? A purpose of noble and honorable influence? I don't have to have all the answers, I just have to know to never cause harm where harm isn't absolutely necessary, and to do right and good when hope is all that is left.
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