Friday, September 24, 2010

What will having hope do for me? (#602)

For so long in my life I lived without actually hoping for something for myself. I just lived day to day, getting what I could get because I had no sense of purpose. It was a daily routine of seeing what I could get for me without any rationalization of the consequences I was creating. I sought no guidance or rule set to live by. I just wanted what I wanted anyway I could reasonably, or close to that, obtain it. My life was unprincipled and untrustworthy.  I was fine with that since everyone else seemed to be doing the same thing. Fairness was who could lie, cheat or steal to get what they wanted. My problem was that I was not consciously able to lie, cheat or steal with any real talent. My soul or spirit drew a line at "how low I would go." Fortunately for me I had found a bottom from which I could go no lower. I knew that if I was going to continue living it had to be different than what I was doing previously. Fast forward to today. I have something within me that is called hope. It is a promise of what could be if I put my best efforts toward it and stay positive. It is only what could be and in no way does it realistically have to come true. But my hope is real and that is the point. In many ways we are taught that it is the journey of life that is important and not necessarily where we are going. With the hope I have now within me I can have both, the journey and the destination. I am not guaranteed this but I can try and give my best living to it. My character and personality dictate to me that without my hope I have nothing but an empty existence of being but not purposeful doing. Having hope is the key to why I am reflecting out to everyone else who I am.

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