My immortal self is just a faint memory. My youth was deceived into believing that time was irrelevant and I would be able to live like there was no tomorrow. Well tomorrow is here and then some. The price I am paying for the punishing lifestyle I lived has come home to roost. It is amazing that I watch my steps today with care unlike my youth where I charged through life like a wild stallion. Now I am like the horse attached to the milk wagon slowly delivering the milk. There was nothing anyone could have said to me when I was young about how I needed to better care for myself for when I got older and needed to be in good physical shape. I would run and jump all day long as cavalier as the wind. My youth was for living with zest and zeal. My mindset was skewed toward the beauty and strength of my youthful vigor. I was godlike in my senses and attitudes. I was lean, but strong, I was analytical, yet out of control. I had so many varied attributes that I was immortal-like. All of this took place in my own little mind. The world I lived in was of my own making. The reality was that really no one was looking and admiring me, mostly they were curious and then moved on. My youth was such a mixed bag of many experiences that amounted to really very little. Regardless of the outcome of my youth, it was lived at a very fast pace. This fact has not served me well now that I am older and less resilient of mind and especially body. I am okay both physically and mentally, probably far superior mentally then at anytime in my life. However, the toll taken on my body by not throttling back my exuberance and daredevil attitude has left me with the outcome I experience now. If only I had been wise enough to see the cause and effect my choices throughout life have culminated in, I am sure I would have cared better for myself.
No comments:
Post a Comment