The anxiety of uncertainty (#1043)

The unknown and what it could mean has always had me on edge since I can only suppose what might be next. Not knowing is something we all should be familiar with as an idea and emotion. I actually have so much experience at not knowing that I can reasonably predict how I react before I find out the unknown. I have a protocol of behavior that I have become accustomed to displaying as a default. I try like hell to stay calm and open my eyes real wide, either physically or metaphorically, whichever the situation dictates. It is similar to when I end up squaring off in a fight that happens all of a sudden. My eyes open wide and my focus and attention to every detail around me becomes so intense that it seems like time actually does slow down. This behavior of mine has served me well in both the actual physical fights and in the intense moments of the metaphorical ones just before an unknown becomes a known. Much like a tightrope walker, the focus on every little nuance is critically important, as is the control of anxiety when it manifests itself in my life when things are critical to what happens next. Instead of just anticipating and being caught up in the anticipation, I channel that anxious energy into a hardening of my stature. I spread that nervous energy throughout my physical self as a means for preparing myself for the outcome. Uncertainty is something none of us can ever escape, regardless of financial, personal, health, political etc... preparations. We are all going to have to deal with anxiety and how we deal with it is what helps us find ways to overcome it's effect or to become a victim to it.