Rather depressing isn't it? When we finally decided to give in to temptation and go against our own esteemed principles so that we could "fit in" with others who had done the same thing before us. There is no doubt that every one of us has done this and felt the betrayal of the act. We steeled ourselves with resolve to never do it again, but once we have crossed the line of betrayal, it is easier to do it again. Thus the cycle begins to transform us into the selfish cynics we eventually become out of desperation that takes the place of virtue. Some of us have found our way back to the beginning and have re-established our ties to our long forgotten principles and have experienced a rebirth of sorts. In my own case, I had wasted many years dumbing myself down to protect my place within the illusory society I had built around myself. I numbed my brain and my conviction to disregard what I knew was right about me to instead, fit myself, albeit deep down uncomfortably, into my own chosen dystopian existence. How did I climb out of my self-dug hole? First, I decided I wanted to live instead of wanting to die, yes, it came to that. Next, I quit numbing myself to reality and became a part of it instead. Lastly, I reconnected with my soul, the deep down essence of my being, and reacquainted my initial principles founded in virtue to my life in every way I could. Of course I am human and as such continue the streak we humans have of failing more often than we hope but I never quit trying to do the best I can. The moral here is that after you have sharpened your perspective of what it is like to sell your soul for illusory things, you can recapture it with a will to live.
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