Yes, it is up to me to decide. I am not so tied to anything other than keeping myself alive that I couldn't change whatever it is that is against my personal code of ethics. Regardless of the circumstance, I am me first and foremost and if I ever lose my identity again it won't be because I chose to lose it. I had a friend many years ago who would always remind me that if he had lost everything he had except his underwear, he could walk down the street with his head held high and know that he would be alright. My little illusion of a world that is my daily companion could be uprooted from me in an instant and I know in my soul that whatever came next would be a choice by me to do the next right and proper thing for me. I am well satisfied that the only value in my life is what I hold most dear, that being my honor. My friend also used to say that everything material is just so much "pig Iron". Nothing material is greater to me than my honor and since all the years ago, his words still ring true in my ears. I don't have any privileges or deserves from the beginning of my life since life is a crap shoot to begin with. Those of us who have are all just fortunate enough to have survived our infancy and teenage years to get to maturity. The other material values we drag along with us over the years are just security blankets for our egos. If we are fortunate to have children then the equation becomes more complex but only in that the health, safety and opportunities of our children become our greatest priority. My rights to anything beyond my own welfare are icing on the cake and not to be kept all costs, rather they are to be diminished when greater threats to others can be foreseen. it all boils down to me being a principled man who puts others on the same footing I want to be on. Otherwise I won't allow those who are not so inclined to remain a part of my life.
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