I have thought recently, during our shared disappointment time, that maybe it is time to let the daily blog go and instead only write occasionally or not at all. It does seem practical in that the life has been sucked out of me because of the election results here in America. I mean if I keep writing about hope and we keep doing what we did collectively as a nation then my message of shared community is falling well short of an effective mark. So not only is my message of hope falling short but my spirit itself has been crushed by my fellow countrymen who would rather reward the worst of who we are instead of better or the best of who we are. I am only human so it is difficult to reinvigorate myself when I have been so thoroughly crushed.
Now I know there are some out there who would say "come on Carl, it is a setback but we can overcome this", and I would halfheartedly agree. Yet my soul is tired. There is a wound there that has torn me in a way that can only be described as nearly fatal. Now don't get me wrong, I still enjoy the idea of writing about the best of who we are but the sense that it is not enough is real. However, all that being said, I cannot think what it would be like to give up on anything that has such potential and value to all of us. Not my daily writings but my hope for all of our hopes and dreams. I am not a quitter even when my soul is so wounded and I am exhaustively tired of the failures.
I know others in life have endured much harsher realities and fates and I must continue to see that although the best of me is being tested I am so fortunate to be here just deciding whether to do something or not. I get the perspective in a comprehensive way and if I cannot find the silver lining in things so that I can rebuild my energies and recapture the hubris I have for our species then I will have failed as a human being, not just as an advocate for us. Like the title of this post declares, I do this because I care and the care has not left me in any questionable way.
Now I know there are some out there who would say "come on Carl, it is a setback but we can overcome this", and I would halfheartedly agree. Yet my soul is tired. There is a wound there that has torn me in a way that can only be described as nearly fatal. Now don't get me wrong, I still enjoy the idea of writing about the best of who we are but the sense that it is not enough is real. However, all that being said, I cannot think what it would be like to give up on anything that has such potential and value to all of us. Not my daily writings but my hope for all of our hopes and dreams. I am not a quitter even when my soul is so wounded and I am exhaustively tired of the failures.
I know others in life have endured much harsher realities and fates and I must continue to see that although the best of me is being tested I am so fortunate to be here just deciding whether to do something or not. I get the perspective in a comprehensive way and if I cannot find the silver lining in things so that I can rebuild my energies and recapture the hubris I have for our species then I will have failed as a human being, not just as an advocate for us. Like the title of this post declares, I do this because I care and the care has not left me in any questionable way.
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