Do you believe that the truth will eventually win out? I do and for good reason. Because what is behind the truth that is not behind the lie is real conviction. The truth is a perfection of sorts. It satisfies a deep sense within me that can have no other substitute. I have tried to fill my life with convenient lies that at the moment seemed like the "right" thing to do but in the longer run I found the cost of having perpetrated the lies over the truth was too much a price to pay. How is that so? Because when I was less mature I thought I had enough things figured out that the lie would be irrelevant. But as I have gotten older and been on the punishing end of my lies that were revealed, I have found that my soul expects more out of life than my conniving ego. I am consciously scared by my convenient lies in the place of truths because I cannot defend them like the warrior I see myself as. I destroyed bits and pieces of myself for the illusion of some idea of fame or grandeur. What I wouldn't cherish is a chance to live life over with the knowledge I have now about honor and humility. But I cannot go back so the best that I can do is to go forward with the idea that no amount of falsity is worth denying the truth. There is a harmony to life that I feel in my soul and being back within it has only taken me to choose to live in the truth. The hard in life is there for everyone so no excuses about what I choose to do next. I am grateful to life for having spared me more time in it so that I can experience a just and purposeful life instead of a life that skirmishes in the dirty little mind of greed, power and false ego.
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