One of my most regrettable moments will be when I am no longer here in existence. I don't mean to be depressing with this post but rather I am coming to grips with the idea that I won't be able to see and experience how our human life sorts itself out in the far distant future should our species survive our immediate future. Just being a part of the little bit of life I am allowed has only temporarily sated my thirst for more. I want to have the experience of living far into the future just to satisfy my own insatiable curiosity about what is and what isn't. It will not be so however and coming to grips with that is a lifelong enduring realization for me. I suppose by the time my time comes to an end here in existence I will have settled it with myself at least that is my hope. From wherever if anywhere I came from to get here, and to wherever if anywhere I go afterwards, I won't be here for the duration of our species' survival and that is too bad. I want to push every boundary that exists to see where the next boundary is or if there is another boundary beyond our existing boundaries. I want to spend all my time being fascinated by what I don't know and captivated by what I do learn. It is a shame that we all have a sovereign that rules us, it being time. Time will not allow me to remain in this complex mix of logic and emotion that extracts from me every sensation born within me. Time will not allow me to bathe in all of space to my desires, and for that I am truly saddened. I will take what little this existence allows me, but know this, it will never be enough for my curiosity is greater than the time and space given to me.
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