(#5237) I am feeling my age this morning

      I went to bed last night before 7 pm just so I could get a few more hours of sleep. I did sleep more last night than I usually do but I am still bone weary this morning. After a hard week of work, although only four days due to the holiday, and this weekends chores and much more I feel like I am wrung out. At least I am rested for the little that is worth. Today I will let my boss know I cannot keep working 5 days a week and need to go back to the job I had just previous to this one on a part time basis, Monday, Wednesday, and Friday as a transfer driver. The extra days off, Tuesdays and Thursdays, will allow me to recuperate more quickly from my now full schedule of work and home duties helping with my brothers care and plentiful home chores.
     I really do wish I could have stayed on 5 days a week because I like the men who work in the parts department and 40 hours a week offers benefits. But fate has chosen another path for me and 40 hours a week is too much for me to handle at this time. Remember, I am well into my 67th year and thinking I can do things like I am still in my 20's is foolish. The heart and mind are willing to try but the body and reality won't let me. My brother John had a stroke a few months ago and John, who lives in my home, needs me for things that are now more abundant than before the stroke. Having 2 days off during the work week also gives me the time to schedule necessary appointments and outings that cannot be done on the weekends.
     Caring for an elderly person is probably more difficult than caring for a child. In the sense that an elderly person is full grown and a child is still small and less difficult to handle physically. Having some time during the week to not only get some rest for myself but to accomplish tasks for John and the house is the correct decision for now. Maybe in the future other dynamics will come into play that give me more time to pursue what I want for me but that time is not now. Life is funny that way and how we approach our responsibilities, even ones we choose and are not directly ours, is how we define who we are. The die is cast on me for this time being so settling in and making the best of what the throw has shown is what is best for me.