Friday, June 1, 2018

I still feel like a teenager even though I am old (#3409)

     I have been a single man my whole life and although there were a couple of marriage possibilities along the way I never did tie the knot. So girlfriends have come and gone and there were periods of drought on that subject for me as well but one thing that has stayed constant since my youth, a need and a want to embrace a woman with desire if she kindles my soul. When I was a young teenager and making out was all that was on my mind, I felt the same passion then as I do now when I see a woman whose soul aligns with mine. Not just attraction for the sake of attraction but the kind of invisible bonding that only occurs when there is no preconceived notion beyond the simple stirring of a host of intangibles.
     I used to be like most all males who looked solely at outside beauty as the marker for attraction. But I have grown from my base adolescent desires to a more complex deternininer of attraction. The woman has to be as real, honest, curious and compassionate as I. The intellectual and emotional factors are as important as any physical appearance. So when I do meet a woman who aligns with my soul I find that I want to be just like that teenager I was and make out with her with a passion as strong as my earlier teenage fumblings. It is a wonderful feeling to know that life within me is constant in some areas despite the aging process.
     Now let me explain one thing first. I am 62 but even though that is reality, I don't really think of myself as old although I am looking like it ever more with the passage of time. There are times when I feel like a child and despite my current age it is real within me. So for me to have the stirrings of being attracted to a woman like a teenager is confirmation that although I am more mature, I am still young at heart and haven't lost my desire to share moments of intimacy when those moments present themselves. I like this and although it wasn't easy to write about this I think I got my message through without making it creepy or disingenuous.

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